There are plenty of times that I wonder if my life will ever get easier…. Mostly because it seems to always be up in the air.

This time, it’s kind of my fault. Because I quit my job. I turned in a one week resignation notice on Sunday. By the end of the week I’ll basically be unemployed.

Overworked, Probably Way Underpaid

I’m not totally crazy. At least I’d like to think I’m not. As long as I end up graduating in May, I’m in my last few months where I can actually do this without an insane amount of planning. Which worked out nice in this case….

Because my job turned into something unbearably soul crushing.

From Halloween until Thanksgiving last year I had NO days off. Not a one. I worked seven days a week. I was off on Thanksgiving, which worked out nicely since I spent the day pretty sick. But I was back to work at 3:00 AM for Black Friday! And I came perilously close to working from then until Christmas with no days off.

I thought everything was better when we got a new manager. But that was the compounding factor that made it the beginning of the end for me.

No Real Break

For a very brief time, there were four people as there should be. Then the other other original employee besides me transferred. Then the other person put in her two weeks to go to a better job. Once again, the math got to a point that seemed painfully familiar.

Even with new people being hired, they won’t be working in time. I almost worked two months straight for this stupid company, and all I got was a thanks and a $5 gift card to Starbucks. I’m sure as hell not working seven days a week again. I don’t need the money that bad.

Not only that, but the manager is a new manager…. And has no idea how to manage. Two things that have really pissed me off: One, he won’t do things that are his job, I’ve been doing it….. I quit about a week or so ago and it hasn’t be done, but I no longer care; Two, he told me to watch out because corporate was going around and getting rid of people….. He basically threatened my job.

I’ve been at this place since they opened this location last April. He got hired in December. So, um, excuse fucking me?! I’m not going to be abused and threatened and then have a written warning for some bullshit. Yeah, I have a bad attitude. Mostly because I was expected to be okay after working so damn much and getting a whole four days off to “recover.”

Moving On

Earlier this month I started looking for a new job. I’ve had a couple of interviews but I haven’t really gotten anywhere yet. I’m also a little weary about job hunting at the moment since I have a two week vacation to go on in March. But I will be looking.

I thought that maybe for a couple of weeks I’d just be the “ski bum” I’ve really wanted to be, lol. (Just kidding. Sort of.)

If I don’t find anything until April/May I won’t be too upset. I’m trying my best to take this in stride. I’d really like to find a job utilizing my degree (business degree, specifically human resource management) or, my dream, in the auto parts industry. I kinda want to move on from my “student” retail jobs and get something more like an “adult” job.

Of course, this derails my plans a bit…. The S2000 really needs new tires after all, plus a new suspension. But honestly, it was NOT worth staying to basically be told how much I suck and need to be a good little slave and be nice to people I can’t stand.

If worst does come to worst and I need to get a job, I do have enough experience in the wireless phone industry to get another job. Do I want to? Not really, because it’s what I’ve done for the past few years and I’m pretty tired of it. I don’t want to get stuck, heh. But it’s nice to have the option there. (And knowing that if I did it, it’d be for better pay than I get now. That would be nice….)

So who knows. In a really cheesy way, I feel like I’m opening myself up to a new possibility by finally cutting this horrible job loose. It’s probably way overdue. (I’m kinda kicking myself for not interviewing with Apple back in October…. Sigh. But I had no idea it’d be so bad. If I did, I’d probably be working for Apple.)

But trust me when I say that I know it will take work from me to find the right job. It won’t just fall into my lap. So I’m really gonna try.

Wish me some luck, please, ’cause I really feel like I could use it….. It wasn’t easy to leave earlier than I wanted to, but I had to for my sanity. Now it’s time to figure out what comes next…..

And I’m not joking, either.

In March, my husband and I are taking off for nearly two weeks of blissful vacation to Disney World in Orlando. Since we skipped a honeymoon and it’s our fifth anniversary this year, we figured it was about time for a nice big trip like this.

In a way, this was going to be a non-car-related trip at all. We often travel because of cars or something to do with cars, a la Miatas at Myrtle Beach or my excursion with the Porsche Club to Canada. Even when we visited Seattle last fall, we had to include the Ferrari dealership as a stop in the trip.

Well, trying to fit in attendance to the 12 Hours of Sebring didn’t work out well. The dates, yes, the rest of the travel plans…. Not so much. We decided that that would be left to its own trip someday and to just do the “touristy” Disney thing for now, sans cars.

That is, until I found the Exotic Driving Experience. And I just couldn’t say no. I mean, who could?!

Pricey, yeah, but so is everything else like this that I’ve looked into. And believe me, I’ve wanted to plan a trip to Las Vegas to do one of these things for quite some time. (Vegas just because it’s somewhat close, cheap to fly, abundant places to stay and, well, supercars!)

Perhaps my only disappointment was the lack of a 911 Turbo, which, as you all should know, I’m completely obsessed with. Sad, but I’ll get there someday anyhow, even if it’s not this year.

I pretty much zeroed in on the 458 Italia from the beginning. How could I not? My first Ferrari love was the F430, but I even have a fondness of the 360 Modena, so of course I’m going to love the next evolution of the line. That and, well, I don’t ever see myself owning a 458, though I expect I’ll become rather smitten with the car.

My husband will be commandeering the wheel of the Lamborghini Gallardo LP570-4 Superleggera. She’d have been my first choice, if I wasn’t just a total Ferrari > Lamborghini girl. But I’ll get to the Lamborghinis eventually. I mean, I have to drive them at some point… I have zero desire to own one after all. (While I don’t think I’ll ever own a 458, it’s not because I wouldn’t want to!)

Of course, I’ll be sharing my experience here. I have my trusty iPhone 4S to have snaps of the day, and we’ll be purchasing whatever souvenirs/photos/video they have to offer. It’s just going to be a super special day, I already can’t wait.

In the meantime, I’ve been doing some extra research on the 458 Italia. I want to kinda get to know her before I *really* get to know her. So I found a couple of videos on YouTube that I enjoyed. Hope you like them too!

I almost hate to phrase it this way, because it seems almost too prevalent…. “Find your passion!” “Follow your passion!” “If you live your passion, the money will follow!”

Well, clearly the money comes first in racing….. No surprise there. Cars are an expensive hobby to have period. But can’t I do some sort of work with cars, seeing as how it’s my passion?

Why yes, yes I can. And so the search has begun.

Time for Changes

Selling phones is old to me. I worked seven days a week for almost two months straight….. That’s not right. That shouldn’t have happened. I shouldn’t have to put up with a company that willingly does that to their people. And all I got for it was some thanks and a $5 Starbucks gift card.

It’s time to move on.

My dream career at this point in my life is working in the Parts department in a dealership. It’s something I could see myself doing now, and actually moving up to a manager position someday. In retail I could never see being a manager…. No thanks. Not for me. But this? Sure!

So I’ve started to look for a job in Parts. And I’m hoping I find it soon… I’m really ready for this change. I want more than just a job, I want a real career.

The Dream

In October, we went on our second trip to Seattle to just bum around and enjoy the city. Before we left, we stopped at the Ferrari dealership. Definitely an amazing place, the F40 and my dream 550 Maranello aside.

We spent some time talking to the Parts manager of the dealership. And it didn’t hit me until recently that I really want to do his job someday. Maybe not for Ferrari, because I’d definitely love working for Porsche too. Or any other type of dealership. But if I have to pick one, my goal would be to be the Parts manager for a Ferrari dealership.

The best thing that I can do now to make that dream a reality is to get into the field. I need to get into Parts now so that I can build up the knowledge and experience and build an actual career.

Fingers Crossed

Lately I’ve been crossing my fingers a lot. I’ve gone on one interview for what is, essentially, the ideal job for me right now…. And I’m hoping and praying that it’s meant to be and that they like me.

I also talked to a floor manager of a dealership about jobs there. I know for sure that I do not want sales. But it helped me when he told me that I’d be really good in Parts or Service. It gave me hope that I’ll be able to find the job I want to set me on my ideal career path.

So, if it’s not too much to ask, send me some good vibes? And big thanks to those of you who have already…. Much love!

I’m gonna make this happen…… I’m determined!

Photo via….

Along with reflecting on the past year, I’m somewhat big on planning for the next one. It’s kinda funny in a way, because I never know exactly what could happen. While it would be weird for us to be moved again so soon, it can happen. So I do take my plans with a grain of salt somewhat.

I’ve already mentioned my first goal before — selling my Miata and 240sx. It’s not what I really want to do, but in order to get to the next step I kinda have to. I can’t keep all my cars forever, and the aspect of such aintensive project like the 240sx has been just doesn’t hold the same appeal for me anymore. Something has to give when I dread thinking about parts that need to be bought and work that needs to be done. And the Miata…. Well, I just don’t drive her much anymore at all.

My second goal deals with the car I’ll have left after selling “my” two, the S2000. It’s a bit intimidating, because the one great thing about the other two were that parts were cheap. Not so anymore, but since she’ll be “my only” for a bit it should be okay. (The STi is taken care of by my husband and is the car he usually drives.) I’m planning on buying her a set of coil overs, KW Variant 3′s, since she probably could use the suspension overhaul. She’ll also be getting new tires, though I’m not sure what yet. I’ll also be buying a passenger seat rail for my Bride Zeta III that’s in the 240 right now and the S2000 will finally have matching seats again. Plus our first car to have two racing seats. (I’ll have to figure out something with harnesses……)

The S2000 also gets to be my race car in 2012. I’m hoping to do as many autocross days as I can and we’re hoping to fit a track day in somewhere as well. We’ll see how these good intentions go.

Not sure this counts for 2012, but shortly here we’ll be buying skid plates for the STi. This should kinda show our intentions on her direction….. My husband is continuing his search for rally lights for herthat both work and are okay with me. (I’m not super crazy about the idea of a set of four lights mounted to the hood….)

Basically, this is what I like as far as the rally lights go, but not sure how it would work with the skid plates we're getting... :/

On the rally vein, I’d really love to visit DirtFish in 2012. And if they have the big Subaru meet up again this year like they did last year I really want to go. Same thing if they do rallying in Oregon again….. We couldn’t go last year because it was right before my husband deployed. Basically, I’m hoping for a few more trips to cool events and places.

My biggest plan for 2012 is finding another car, though. While I intended to sell my two and downsize back to two, I should have known it wouldn’t quite work for me. I won’t be buying for quite some time, maybe not even in 2012 at all. But I’m working on getting the funds together to purchase a Porsche 911 SC. I’ve loved them forever, and have finally had enough with the dreaming…. Time to start doing. I’m not sure how or when yet, but I’m going to be working on this goal all year. (Much of it does depend on selling the two cars first, though.)

This is my dream!

Aside from all of that, I’ll be pretty pleased with myself if I continue to work on my photography. 2011 wasn’t my greatest year for it and I want to do better. My iPhone spoils me with its nice and handy camera and easy editing. I want to finally work on using my copy of Photoshop Elements and getting my Nikon out more. Maybe even getting the other two flashes I would like and getting that whole thing set up…. We’ll see on that, for now it’s not that high on my list.

2012 should be an exciting and fun year….. I hope.

I have this new interest… And it’s kinda weird. I think, since it’s winter and nothing much is going to be happening here, that I’m going to figure out if it’s a passing thing or not.

My weird new interest is…..

Not sure what it is..... But vintage cameras have captured my interest!

Vintage cameras. Kinda random really.

While I really love photography, I’m a happy digital photographer. My only brushes with film that I can recall were disposable cameras given to me on vacations to play with. I sort of remember having a regular sort of point and shoot film camera, but nothing crazy.

My Nikon D3000 was my first SLR, and I still love her. Even if I don’t use her nearly as much as I should. :/

My interest in vintage film cameras mostly comes in the collectible and resale market. For me, it seems like a possible way to take something I enjoy (photography, cameras) with a way to make a little money off of it.

This probably has to do with: one, my recent sales of a few things on eBay — I mean actually selling things for once! Haha. And probably also to do with the fact that since I decided to sell some things on eBay I began reading blogs written by people who sell things on eBay.

Yup, work gives me way too much time to read…. I have read blogs that make me want to sell on eBay, refinish furniture and can pickles. Help.

Either way, in the end I’m just looking for ways to help save up for the next car I want to buy…. A Porsche 911 SC.

I've actually printed out this photo to keep as a visual reminder of what I'm working towards right now!

Seriously, how appropriate would it be paying for a vintage Porsche with profits from vintage cameras?! (Yes, I daydream way too much. I already know.)

I’ve somewhat come to peace with my decision to sell my Miata and 240sx. Well, about as “at peace” as I can possibly be until the day I actually have to say goodbye to them.

Part of what makes it bearable, of course, is the fact that I’ll still have two fantastic cars to drive. The STi certainly isn’t going anywhere for a few years at least, and the S2000 I have vowed to NEVER sell. She means way too much for me and I draw my selling line at her.

However, I always really considered the S2000 my husband’s car, while the Miata was mine and the 240 became my project. I also consider the STi his, because it was more for him than for me. (I definitely benefit and I really enjoy her, but he drives her more than I do and what not.) In a way, selling my two leaves me with none.

Because I’ve decided to sell, my husband has pretty much “given” me the S2000. She’s now “mine.” I guess the distinction really came in as far as maintenance and modification costs — and I have now assumed the role of financial provider for the S2000. She’s also the car I drive more often than not, at least when the weather and logistics allow.

It’s still weird to me that I struggle with this “yours, mine and ours” concept when it comes to the cars. We don’t really have it drawn out, but we tend to drive one more than the others or what things for one more than the others. We share all the cars equally and have no issue paying for what they need.

For me, it’s more of a “proving I’m a car girl” sort of thing I guess. Somehow, having a car that my husband mostly paid to modify is less exciting to share than a car that I paid for the mods on. Like I said, weird, and probably a little stupid too. I’m just as much responsible for the modifications done to the S2000 as my husband is. I never pushed to have another S2000 because I joked that the only difference would have been color. (Actually, our taste is so similar that I never see us having “his and hers” cars. They’d be identical save for our color choices.)

I’m looking forward to saving up the funds and buying the S2000 a set of coilovers myself. She could use them, and I think it’ll help me get over my funk. At least that’s my hope.

(Not that I’m not already making plans for my next car that will be “all mine,” hehehe….)

I’m afraid I don’t have too much car-related, and that I won’t for a few months. Winter weather has made its appearance and the cold makes me not want to do much of anything. (Other than go and finally buy a snowboard and hit the mountain.)

This Saturday I’ll be heading out to the Porsche dealership for the Club’s Tech Session, but other than that I’ve been swamped with work… Which gives me way too much time to think. And come up with posts like this, heh.

As many of you know, my husband is military. We live on a military base. I work on the same base we live on, resulting in an awesomely short five minute commute. However, this is about the best part of it.

I pretty much despise being surrounded by it so much. It’s almost soul-crushing, no kidding. Why? People around here just like to be so… Mediocre.

I mean this because they never seem to aspire to anything. I have my dreams and hopes and things I want to accomplish, but most people seem to think that having dreams and actually achieving them are impossible. I just don’t get it.

I’m working on selling both the Miata and the 240sx. Part of me does want to set aside a fairly large chunk of the resulting sales to put towards my first 911. I’m tempted to find the 911 SC of my dreams and get one… But at the same time, it would cause such a fuss to bring one home I’m not sure that I can. (Why I really want the bike, and also because the bike is easier to move when we end up PCSing again.)

I can probably find a good 911 SC for around $17,000. She may or may not need an engine rebuild, but even if she does after that she’d be good for quite some time and quite some miles. As much as I adore modern 911′s, the 911 SC is my favorite. I love the old school looks and the whale tail, I can’t get over it. I want it.

But as much as I know I could probably do this, I have to think about whether or not people are going to get dumb over it. When my husband took the S2000 to our last base, he actually got investigated for selling drugs because some guy thought it was a Porsche. So my fears aren’t without reason — It’s because we were investigated for having a Porsche when we didn’t. I don’t know what will happen when we do. (Even if I end up getting an SC for under $20,000.)

I know cars aren’t everyone’s cup of tea. But what I don’t understand is why I feel like I’m punished for what I like and what I hopelessly spend a ton of money on. It should be my right to spend my money how I please and not have to answer to anybody, but here it feels like I have to. Like me achieving a dream of mine is somehow wrong.

I already know I’m weird — I should be graduating college soon with my bachelor’s (better late than never?), I have a job and I prefer to work. Actually, I have two jobs, my regular one and one that I pick up when I can. I could have a third regularly if I wanted it, and I just signed up to do mystery shopping for my other days. And right now I’m working just over 40 hours a week, and am on day #18 in a row for work.

I don’t have kids, nor do I want them. I only have a cat and no dog. I don’t want to spend my days sitting at home, and I go to the gym and actually work out until I’m tired and not half-ass it.

For most of the people I know, this is normal. For where I live and the people I’m surrounded by, I’m really, really, really weird. And I don’t mind it…. Except when what I do is made other people’s business and it actually affects what I feel I can and cannot do.

I know I’ll get my 911 eventually. I know I’ll even have the 911 SC that I covet. The sad part is I may not have her as soon as I want her.

But I will have her. Someday. Idiots that surround me be damned.

To me, there’s something about being into cars that always entailed doing my own work. I, however, am a tiny person with tiny muscles and not very much weight to throw around.

While I am quite knowledgeable on how to properly change a tire, there is little hope in the way of me doing so on my own without a rather large breaker bar and some dangerous hopping on said breaker bar in the hopes of breaking lug nuts loose.

That said, I usually stick to smaller things that don’t require gobs of insane muscle. (Or just the ones you get from being born with XY chromosomes.)

Burned Out Bulb

I was ever so kindly (*cough*yeah right*cough*) notified one night by some base cops that my license plate bulb was out. After getting home (finally. jerks…) I found out that yes indeed, the bulb was out.

No big deal right? Right. We had already planned on replacing it with an LED bulb.

Oh, I ought to mention that this was the poor S2000. So while the bulb was indeed out, it was a total BS stop. At the very least, it shouldn’t have taken as long as it did and once the cop realized I was a girl, he made some sort of attempt at being smooth…. (Which did not work and won’t ever work on me.)

Plus the other guy with him was standing on the other side of the car for unknown reasons… It was just a bit creepy.

So, in the interest of not making the S2000 any more of a target for harassment than she already is, I ordered the bulb. (After waiting for a week or so and then deciding to not tempt anybody anymore.)

The Replacement

The bulb arrived fairly quickly, and really that’s what it was — a bulb. Don’t ask me what I was expecting, maybe I’m just used to ordering more than *a* bulb.

The LED bulb!

So, how hard can it be, right? How many does it take to change one license plate bulb??

Well, I managed to do it! The hard way, naturally.

There’s the plastic housing that protects the bulb, and mine popped right off. Apparently that’s not always the case, and sometimes it’s necessary to remove the entire bracket that houses the light…

Yup, I took off that entire bracket just to pop a light out and pop a new one in. Nobody said I was a genius when it came to this sort of thing. (Bulbs imply electricity, and if left on my own, I would kill myself with electricity. Fast.)

Needless to say, shortly after this I made sure to buy myself a set of needle nose pliers. If I had my trusty, favorite tool it probably wouldn’t have been so crazy. I mean, I was a little scared of breaking the original bulb with the vice grips I ended up using…

So, after a long and drawn out process that should have taken mere minutes, the bulb was successfully changed AND working!!

The working bulb! Pretty, huh?

And I feel really accomplished, haha. Still. I have to fight the urge to get out of the car and check to make sure it’s still working… Because I’m pretty sure it’s just fine.

Though now I think I’m ready for the challenge of upgrading the one on my 240SX. Maybe….

A while back I had mentioned that I was going to give modeling a try. Since then, I’ve gone on a total of two photoshoots and have worked on learning quite a bit about the modeling industry. I figured I’d share what I’ve learned so far.

It’s not easy work.

First off, my respect for models has grown exponentially. That’s not to say that I never respected them, but you don’t realize how hard it actually is until you try it.

A photoshoot that lasts a couple of hours will wear you out. It’s tiring to keep posing, yet you still have to look as cute and fresh and happy as when you started. It’s not something you can keep up unless you’re having fun and you like it. I was actually a bit sore the next day after my second shoot. (My abs hurt, ha.)

It also makes you focus quite a bit on yourself. For me, it can drag up a lot of old thoughts of inadequacy and insecurity. I tend to over-scrutinize every little thing, and while I need to pay attention it isn’t something that needs to be super hardcore. Mostly it’s just keeping in good shape and clean and all the stuff you should do normally. (Only I can take it to extremes, especially when it comes to weight.)

So much for downsizing the closet…

Funny enough, I wanted to get rid of some of my clothes. Now I’ve come to realize that I need MORE clothes, ha.

Different shoots with different outfits require a wide variety of clothes I just don’t have, such as different color bikinis or nice dresses or any number of outfits. (Certainly matching undergarments, which I have little of, I hate to admit.)

So in the past month alone I’ve stepped back into the clothes shopping ring and gotten a few things with modeling in mind, and I also take it into consideration when I go to buy anything else. It’s funny doing it, but it helps make sure that I feel good in what I get and that it’s all very functional. (Ha! I’m even into function when it comes to clothes…. Lol.)

But I still search for good deals, just as I do for my car parts. I easily spent more on the 240SX and Miata in the last month than on clothes for me, no worries!!

Still hoping for car work!

My first shoot to get my portfolio started was with our S2000, so that was definitely car-related haha. The second shoot I did was a studio shoot, so the closest I got to cars was CarsxGirl’s current facebook profile picture, with a cute race-inspired outfit.

I’m planning on a lot of work with another local photographer, ranging a fair bit but incorporating some car work and also some bike work. With my tattoos, I’m pretty well suited for modeling with Harley’s, ha. I don’t mind though, because I adore bikes. I’m still working on getting one of my own…

Not sure where it’ll all go, but I’m working on finding my own place in the industry, which is all I can ask for. I used to think that my tattoos would hold me back from too much, until I realized that they really just set me apart… And when it comes to modeling, being different and having a great attitude are what it boils down to.

One thing I’d like to try is becoming an HIN girl, though I’m not sure how that’ll all work out… And while import models have a pretty bad rap, I’d like to think that wouldn’t stop me from being one and showing how different some girls are.

After all, I seem to love breaking stereotypes… Why not take it to another level?

And no, I’m not talking about this kind of burnout…

I mean the kind you get when you’ve been doing something for too long at too crazy of a pace and you just can’t seem to keep going anymore.

Say what?

It’s not that I don’t like cars anymore, definitely not! But it’s been such a crazy time with them that other areas of my life have been, well, somewhat neglected.

As much as I hate to admit it, I like being girly and shopping for clothes and painting my nails and all sorts of other things. And when I wanted to get into modeling, the goal was to get in with car-related shoots… But it’s all things I need to work up to. (Which means doing other things for now.)

When I got into cars, I kinda cut that out… It worked for a little while, but certainly wasn’t going to last for any long period of time.

I think somewhere is my happy car medium, where they aren’t neglected themselves but they aren’t the only thing I ever do.

Slow down?

I guess part of me wants to slow down, but I definitely have been doing that and it seems to be working.

My 365 project has been harder now than it was before with the car tie-in. I feel like I’d want to explore other bits of photography, but I also have been doing so good with the car thing too so it’s hard to want to move away from that. I managed half the year so far, why not keep going, right?

I mean, a photobook half of cars and then half of everything else would be kinda weird… So I’ll probably keep going with that. (And I haven’t missed a day yet! *crosses fingers*)

And the cars have definitely gotten work done. All of them will have gotten new bits and pieces this summer, most notably the S2000 (Spoon wheel & Bride seat) and the 240SX (working! and new wheels/tires) while the Miata only got a replacement wheel and new tires. (But 180 tread tires! )

As for the blog…

I plan on continuing the blog, how could I not? I’ve gotten a great positive response from people and will continue to keep up my twice weekly schedule. It’s almost been a full year for this blog anyhow!

Tomorrow I’m getting up nice and early to meet with some friends and go to Formula D’s round four, so that’ll be exciting. I’m looking forward to sharing my experiences from that!

But I also think I may go for more of the car life aspect than just the cars. Because really, that’s what my life is… Cars are so ingrained in it that I can’t separate them out, they’re just there.

They also aren’t everything, though. It may work longer for some people, but I don’t think I’m one of them. I’m not giving up, but I am scaling it to a more long-term manageable level.

Definitely stick around, I promise to keep trying my best to have interesting things to say and share.